Monday, 19 December 2011

The 6 People You Meet in Hostels

 Recently, I was searching for hostels to stay in this spring. I was browsing hostelworld.com  which brought me fond, and some less fond, memories of staying in hostels. It seems that no matter where you go you, no matter which hostel you stay in, you encounter some of the same cliches.


1.) The Australian-Surely no other nationality travels as much as Australians, they are always to be found, and usually in some state of inebriation. No one drinks or parties quite as much as Australians, so I suggest going out with them. The downside is, for some reason they believe that they have the most authentic travel experiences, although they can only remember about 30% of them. You did something cool? Yeah, well, they went running with the bulls yesterday, and the day before that they swam the English channel.

2.) The Mental Breakdown-Traveling is stressful! No matter what anyone says, after you've been abroad, even if it is a vacation, you need a vacation. Traveling can be lonely and exhausting. Problems seem so much bigger when you're away from family and friends. You'll always find someone in the midst of some personal crisis, we've all been there. For some reason a large quantity of people think that the perfect time to break up with their partner is while said partner is off traveling. The Mental Breakdown is characterised by crying, yelling into the phone, storming around and consumption of sangria.

3.) The Horny Toad-The Horny Toad is easiest to spot. They are clearly only at this hostel to pick someone up. They can often be found in the vicinity of the mental breakdown, attempting to give sound advice while simultaneously encouraging alcohol consumption. Is your roommate a horny toad? Here's how to tell, casually mention a significant other and/or 'wanting a quiet night in'. If they absolutely refuse to talk to you after this, they are a horny toad.


4.)The Hippie Grandpa- Nobody quite knows what the hippie grandpa is doing in your hostel. He seems to always be around sporting his unkempt hair and matching beard. He seems to be a permanent fixture of the hostel but surely he is just passing through?

5.) The Indignant North American- What is it about life in North America that has conditioned us to believe that things will always run smoothly, someone will always be around to help you, and customer service must always be friendly? If you have ever stayed in a hostel, or traveled at all, you will know that trains don't come on time, sometimes (or all the time) the internet in your hostel doesn't work, nobody has any information to help you and did that phone call just cost me 3 euros per minute? The indignant North American believes that Europe (or wherever they are traveling) is conspiring against them, They missed their flight? The airline's fault. A bomb found in the ubahn line?  Placed there for the sole purpose of interrupting their day of sightseeing. Crappy service in a restaurant? They are off to the embassy! This breed of hostel-goer can be easily spotted because they are yelling into their phone/computer or at their traveling companion about what has inconvenienced them.

6.) The Italian- The Italian has great contempt for you and your English speaking cronies. They will talk to you but only to humour you, and do you get that feeling that they are laughing at you? Well, yes, they probably are. As someone once said "Italy is nice except for all the Italians".  No, I'm only joking, I'm sure Italians are lovely but there is something about those Southern Europeans, they may be open and friendly to each other, but if you're an English person in their midst, you can't help feeling a teeny tiny bit like they are patronizing you, if they even notice you at all.

Honestly, I love traveling and I love staying in hostels and I love meeting people from different nationalities. Have I had some unpleasant experiences, yeah, but I am always looking forward to the next trip and am even looking forward to going to Italy someday soon (hopefully!)
P.S. don't you think hostel photographers deserve an award? The pictures always make it look like you are going to some luxury spot and you get there and there is a hoard of june bugs who have set up camp in your room which hasn't been cleaned in months.

Pictures from www.hostelworld.com

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