Once Upon a Time-Episode 7 Recap

Thursday, 15 December 2011

Yikes, guys, I have been putting of my review of this weeks Once Upon a Time episode for so many reasons, namely, I was so stunned by this episode I don't even know where to start. I feel like the writers of absolutely given up on this show and basically just barf cliches all over the page and call it an episode. Not to mention, the ridiculous affects. Basically this episode focuses on the Huntsman/Sheriff. He has 'honour' because he is always filmed in soft focus and also, cries over killing animals. Okay, that would be okay if not, right after claiming this, he knifes two guys. I have a conceptual problem with this, someone who knifes two guys, even if they are a pain in the arsey, doesn't get the title of honourable. Also, he doesn't feel anything for the mayor. Meanwhile, Mary Margaret canoodles with the doctor, who is more or less, a non character. But then she starts to like him! And he sends flowers. Emma, and her thinly veiled commitment issues, tells her one night stands are the way to go. Oprah shows up and everyone talks about their emotional walls.  Mary Margaret starts talking about her feelings and how, obviously, Emma likes the Sheriff. I don't know why Emma doesn't just bring her A-game a bit and be like, hellooo sheriff, while only wearing a badge or something. Except, sleeping with other people's boyfriends is commonly thought of wrong, but frankly, on this show, who cares? Everyone stomps over everyone else's feelings like there is no tomorrow. Anyway, Sheriff McIrish starts having flashbacks/dreams and starts chasing a wolf into the woods...where he finds Mr. Gold and a shovel...? Why is Mr. Gold in the bush with a shovel? That was all I could think in this scene. Is he digging a grave? Having a war with Smeagol? Hunting for mushrooms? Anyway, I digress.  The Sheriff sees himself trying to kill Snow White/Mary Margaret. He goes to her and is all, "have I ever tried, you know, stabbing you?". She assures him he hasn't. So he asks her if she remembers meeting him, or anyone else in the town. She says she doesn't but that's just life, right? Um, no, not really, Mary Margaret, I can remember meeting almost everyone I know, excluding family.  So he does what anyone who has weird flashbacks and a sudden sweating problem, would do, he goes to talk to Henry. Henry fills him on the fairy tale angle and tells him the evil Mayor Queen has his heart. This totally makes sense to Sheriff, even though everyone else, including Emma gives him her patented WTF look, which frankly, both of us will have mastered by the time this show is over. He decides to search for it in a crypt. Meanwhile in fairy tale land we see him wear a ridiculous hat as he goes off to kill Snow White at the Queen's behest. I mean, the queen is such a bad villain, I am actually on her side. She doesn't really seem that evil, I mean, other than killing her dad. She just seems like she is trying to get revenge over a broken heart, which, haven't we all been there? And everyone is so patronizing to her, Snow White and Emma, are both all "maybe if you weren't soo evvvillll I wouldn't have stolen all the things you love! Mwahahaha". Anyway, the Huntsman brings the Queen a deer heart, which she promptly brings to her little room of drawers filled with hearts! Which would be evil if it also wasn't so funny! The hearts open their own little drawers! There she realises it's not Snow White, so she STEALS THE HUNTSMAN'S PINK ROCK HEART and has him taken to her bedchamber! (Because people can live without a heart?) Oh the horror! It's so ominous! Back in Storybrook, the Sheriff dumps the mayor who gets into fisticuffs at dawn with Emma. Emma makes out with the Sheriff and the Mayor goes down into the crypt and looks lovingly at her pink rock heart collection. My favourite part of this show is Jennifer Morisson. She looks so confused in every scene. The Sheriff dies in Emma's arms, which I hate to say it, is actually a good ending for the last episode before the hiatus. Maybe the Mayor will start killing people? Pleasse?